Paul Ille [dot] com

Once again it’s Valentine’s Day. The day single women and roses hate, married men scramble to find somewhere to same day ship and committed women and Moms wear giant smiles smelling their beautiful bouquets and wonder if they they should eat that extra piece of chocolate.

Regardless, how your Valentine’s Day goes and regardless who you are this year in the spectrum of situations, it’s just one big festering neon commercial distraction. Just make sure that you’re consistent in loving the people who are most important to you everyday and the rest will fall in place.

To all the people I love, Happy Valentine’s Day

This has to be one of the funniest things I’ve read in a long time, but I must warn you, it’s not sweet and innocent so put the kids to sleep and put on your rated R hat. It’s a list of the 9 most insulting sayings from around the world. I have to try to remember “He’s as thick as a bull’s walt”.

Someone just sent me this one today and it’s truly amazing, funny, sad and unfortunately not a sweeping endorsement of a US education. A Verizon wireless customer fails over and over to get several Verizon customer service reps to understand the difference between .002 cents and .002 dollars. They literally think it’s the same thing. See the story or just get the audio here. It’s a bit long, but worth it. If you know 4th grade math, you won’t believe it.

I’m not sure how I happened upon this one, but it’s…err…different…I’m not sure Europe intended this type of display when they wrote the Final Countdown lol

This last one is more of a ‘you’ve got to be kidding’ story. This article is trying to tell you that if you’re in a long distance relationship, “The planet is about to suffer for your love.” So just for the record, it appears that the importance of low carbon footprints have surpassed love. Imagine that.

Eh ok then here’s a one more for some laughs.