Paul Ille [dot] com

“What’s the strength of a person?” she asked thinking she was internalizing her thoughts. Her face had a surprised expression as she looked at the man next to her realizing she spoke it out loud, but something clicked in her and she went with it asking again. “How would you measure”, pushing the man’s shoulder, “the strength of a person?”

“Doesn’t seem I’ve got the strength to answer”, he said. He had a few drinks by this time.

She chuckled throwing her hands up in the air exhaustedly as a sign she was giving up. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. It takes strength enough to answer a question like that doesn’t it?”

“Sure does”, taking another swig from his bottle of beer.

The woman puts out her hand to his and says, “The name’s Joan”.

“Stan”, he said as he outstretched his arm with hesitation.

Then they arm wrestled.

True trust is not meant for the mind’s intrusion
And I don’t mean just any trust
I mean trust as in life depends upon trust
As in life’s path trust
As in hope’s trust

Sometimes you have to feel to trust
You have to trust in a person to know they’re doing what’s right
Believe that they know better than you
To put aside pride and ego and let them lead you
To let them steer you into it head on
Even though you think you’re going away

It takes trust
And like I said not just any trust

I’m learning
And while I trust all the while, I really do
I think there are levels
There are steps to go up towards it
There are tens of thousands of parts of love to know
And each to hold close
Each to hold dear

I’m trying
Don’t think I’ve ever had to trust so much
To believe in how things will be
To believe in something quite big
Something the mind wouldn’t expect to happen
But the heart never questions
The heart is the true

Guide me by my hand please
I will try to trust as complete as I can
But I need help
It’s hard to let go of this fear

I was digging through my things since the recent CRASH Squad games stirred up a bit of memories and I found all of my demos from when my clan, AI, was on the OGL ladder for Kingpin’s Bagman. There are so many good matches, but I just picked one to see how it came out and how big they’d be. There’s one match in particular the AI had with =LM= that I would really like to put to video. I think this video here was played defending our number one spot in the OGL ladder, but honestly I can’t remember since it was from back in 2000.

For those of you who don’t know Bagman, let me explain how it works.

There are two teams. Nikki’s (Yellow) and Dragons (Red). In this match AI is Nikki’s. The center of the level is called the money pit where the teams fight over collecting money to bring back to their safe within their side of the level. You can pick up a total of 150 from the money pit. If you go into the opposing team’s safe for what’s called a raid you steal 200 dollars. This places a bag on your back so that you can then carry a total of 350 bucks. When you die you drop 10 dollars and any bags you were carrying.

In my opinion the game is quite dynamic since, as a team, you have to control the center, defend your safe and still carry out the occasional raid to keep the other team at bay. Raiding however can be perilous since you’re technically giving the other team money. For every 10 raids it’s 100 dollars for them.

So without further a due, the video is shown from my viewpoint. I’m not sure why my weapon doesn’t show up. Maybe when I recorded the demo I had the FOV set differently or I had special skins that I no longer have. I’m unsure. Oh well, it’s better than nothing. Enjoy the show

I was bored and decided to make a quick CRASH Squad video. Geez it feels like years ago that we made the modification. I guess that’s probably cause it WAS years ago hehe. This video was made from footage from last Friday night played on a level I made called Lockaway Storage. Enjoy the show!

A bunch of the people who played last week were asking if we could have another get together to do some CRASH Squad fraggin so I figured why not? Let’s do it.

Time: Friday May 19th @ 7pm EST
Place: 69.57.142.30:31510

I may also change around the map lineups as well for the night by adding a couple custom maps into the mix so fire up the ole Kingpin and tune in

Friday May 12th TRAM Design is having a CRASH Squad night over on the TRAM Design server and have some fun tossing Molotov cocktails around the place!

Time: Friday, May 12th starting 7pm EST
Place: 69.57.142.30:31510

In case you’re unfamiliar with CRASH Squad it’s a mod that TRAM Design made for the game Kingpin: Life of Crime a while back and it pins CRASH Squad, an LA gang unit against some glock weilding street thugs! If you don’t have Kingpin go get it! You can buy it for like $10-$20 at some places listed here. Then go download CRASH Squad!

You can get all related information and files, etc here!